Up in the Air

September 2009, I was anxious to get to back to LA after an emotionally draining weekend home to attend my grandfather's funeral.  Having had booked my last minute flight with my miles, I was stoked when I discovered I had "priority access" which meant I could board the plane before most which eased my loathing of air travel!!


Barreling down the aisle with my suitcase banging into every other seats' edge, I eyeball my seat/row to see a gentleman already seated in my row - on the aisle no less, which is my seat of choice.  I throw my bag and purse past him into the middle seat and say, "Hi, I'm here."  Then I whip around to score an overhead space.  He stands and asks, "Can I help you with you bag?"  Too stubborn for my own good, I say nicely, "No, thank you, I got it."  And with all my super human woman strength, I pick up my leopard luggage and throw it above my head laterally; however not being an inconsiderate person, I flipped it long so it could fit more suitcases.  I then sat down in my seat and set up my station for the next 3 1/2 hours - iPod, laptop, bottle of water.


Once airborn, I took out my laptop to write this blog - ironically it was still very new in its phases and I was still working out the "kinks".  The gentleman next to me kept quiet but I could sense he was watching me.  Finally he asked, "What are you writing?" "A blog," I said kindly. "Really? What's it about?" he quickly said.  Nervous about anyone knowing about my new blog, let alone admitting what it was about, I said coyly, "Uh, it's about dating actually."  He asked a whole bunch of questions before I revealed the name of it: Mancation.  That peaked his interest moreso and even matter-of-factly said, "I ask a lot of questions because I'm nosey like that because I just want to know."


Plane Guy with an E not an I - also known on my blog as Miles - broke this crabby traveler of solitude and silence by keeping my attention and the conversation flowing for the FULL flight.  And even at the exchange of our dating horror stories, and some of my funny tales, this guy (knowing I wasn't dating) asked me to dinner in hopes he could learn more.  I couldn't say no to an offer like that, even if it was against my 'mancation rules'.  And if you have read or followed my blog from the beginnig, then you already know of the tale of Miles.   Two dates - one in September (2 days after we met on our outbound flight) and one in October.  Both were great dates.  A lot of promise.  A lot of great conversation, laughs, and kisses.  But the reality of the situation always was that we live in two different cities, in two different states.  There was a falling off point somewhere that was never and may never really be defined - and that's okay.  But as a reader/follower, you then know that I hadn't forgotten about my travel companion and reached out to him back in June of this year in an email.


I quickly and carefully composed this email and then shut down my computer and went to bed.  Upon waking I asked myself, "Was that a dream or did I send that?"  Booting up my computer I saw that Miles had responded.  I gasped without opening it.  I went through every rational and irrational thought.  "He's going to tell me to F off!"  "He's going to not get why I emailed him at all." "Maybe he'll write a sentence as simple as thanks."  "I can't read it!  Go make some coffee."  Came back to my computer with a cup of Joe in my hand and still stare at my inbox.  Instead decide to jump in the shower.  Hop out, again with my coffee and decide to rip it off like a band aid.  "This is the only way you can know, Bradshaw, open it."  If you've read "Remember the Miles..." post, then you know what he said.


What's the moral of the tale here?  In life and dating you have to be brave.  Brave to tell him what you want.  Brave to put yourself out there.  Brave to fall on your face.  Brave to know what you want and aren't afraid to go after it.  And if something feels or felt right that you feel wasn't resolved, be brave to put it into the universe that you want to see where the cards fall.  Worse case scenario?  Silence.  Best case scenario?  Well, the possibilities are endless...