Super Mario! (cont.)

Day 1. Met on Halloween.  You read the post "Spooky" - that's him. 


Day 2. The very NEXT day.  Breakfast, beer and football at Barney's Beanery.  I had a great time with this stranger I just met.  He opened my car door, smooched me between plays, and was just so attentive.  I mean all that AND watch football, I couldn't be more in heaven.  We had Miss J and Pimp daddy join us but they couldn't have cared less about sports.  One guy says, "A (west coast) fan and a (midwest) fan, how does that happen?"  I said, "Don't know, just happened."  Mario thought that was funny.  At the end of our outing, Mario says, "I'll call you."  We hug. We kiss. We part ways.  And as I float up to my apartment on what an awesome 24 hours have unfolded, I couldn't help but ponder, "Would he call?"  Then again, he also joked all day on Sunday that we were on vacation so we were in no hurry to go anywhere or do anything.  Hmm.  

Day 3.  Sweatin' a bit... As I try to talk myself out of hope, my phone beeps at like 10:30pm.  "Sorry so late, wanted to touch base with you. How was your day?"  We texted a bit and he wanted to see me the following night but I had dinner plans with the girls, so I suggested another night this week.  I guess that's something.  I'm a little apprehensive but yet I can't help the way I felt when I was around him.  Trying to dip my big toe in before jumping in that pool you know? 


Day 4 - after a football-full day for me and a continued day after boys night out for him, he called to ask to see each other later that evening.   He walked to my house and greeted me at the door with a kiss and we walked hand in hand to the video store to get a movie.  Boy was on me like a fat kid likes cake.  Once we decided on a movie we walked to Pinkberry for some yogurt.  We walked from there to his house on a brisk fall evening and decided to speak in Boston accents - though neither one of us are from there - but by simply blurting out certain words out loud made us laugh contagiously.  (Like "bah", "haba", "chowda").  Mario fell asleep halfway through the movie because Javier didn't entice him with the gay story line and boy-boy action.   That's what he gets for never reading the back of a DVD cover.


Day ?, ?? and ???...He sent me the cutest picture of him on Friday night in his Mario costume (He was at an 80s party) and the caption said, "I ruined my manvacation for this guy?"   Sent me kisses to say good night. 
Saturday we flexted all night (he was out with his buddy).  He asked that I meet him around midnight for a drink up the street. I had just finished my work so I decided too since I could.  Sitting at the bar waiting for him I was so nervous suddenly. That hasn't happened in awhile.  He came in and gave me a big smooch.  We had a great time staying there for like an hour.   
Sunday we watched a bit of football snuggled up on the couch, and then he we walked up to the Farmer's Market for lunch.  Parked ourselves on the sidewalk eating yummy food and just talking on a beautifully hot day.  Just strolling around hand in hand.  Then we walked to the Dome to see Where the Wild Things Are (which he didn't like), then walked home.  He walked me to my door, gave me a big kiss and hug and then I had the rest of my night free.  It was a PERFCT day.  


Day (oh I lost count but it's week 3?) ... ok, this wasn't a date it was  an friend outing.  Explaining my new situation...My friend Nick was like 'I never see this side of Carrie, the girly side, it's refreshing."  Ugh.  I hate being a girl.  I want to tell him that I want to continue to see him  but just want to know if it's something he wants to pursue further or we're just "having fun" and I've been trying to go with the "I'm having fun phase" and relinguish a bit of the control (as I tend to do)... 

Girl Friend says: I don't know. I think the situation is fine. But, I don't know if I would like dating somebody that has to announce "how he is".

CONTINUATION OF WEEK 3 (thursday to be exact) - Day ????...  Watched the Lakers/Bulls and ordered some take out.  He brought over a bottle of wine.  The latest there is I learned his birthday is NEXT week!   I'm currently trying not to be "girly" and let things be as they may- we are just dating and I don't need to "define" it yet but I guess I realize I want to stand still -perhaps get off the beach on my man vacation and board the plane back home. (Previously I asked some guys their opinions on my girly fleeting thoughts and they said, "It sounds like he likes you.  And he may be thinking wow, everything has changed so immediately and I met an awesome girl on top of it all.") I'd love to believe that but know so many guys do the disappearing act or say things they don't deliver on that I'm really trying not to be jaded or cynical.  He did say to me "I haven't found my rhythm yet" so that's always in the forefront of my brain...my instinct says ABORT! 

AND THEN...THERE WAS NONE!- I have ALWAYS had a theory about how weird dating can be before the holidays hit (for those of you who don't know, that begins with Thanksgiving and ends with New Years Eve).  Thanksgiving week approached, I sent him a Thanksgiving text, which of course he responded to and simply said, "Happy Thanksgiving, I'll call you when I"m back in LA."  I left it at that but to be honest, I suddenly became really disinterested. What a polite brush off.  


HIS BIRTHDAY...my last ditch effort cause I need assurance one more time that the guy "just isn't that into me like that" and leave a voicemail wishing him well in my nice-girl demeanor.  Then upon hanging up I'm angry that I had.  

He texts me back later that night around 11pm  (I left the vm around 7) thanking me and asking me how I was and referencing inside jokes and stories we told.  Finally when I couldn't be "witty" anymore I said, "Enjoy your day, good night."  And Never Really Heard From Him Again.  


** SIDEBAR - as I was finally updating my blog and wanting to tell my take of not-so-super-Mario, we spoke on chat on Facebook.  That story follows...the story of the fall-out boy (not a member of that band) 

Sex and the City moment

"Who cares about what you are, just enjoy it." - Samantha 


You can always revert ANYTHING back to a quote or episode from Sex and the City.  Always! 

The Ah-ha Moment

“Ah ha!” you exclaim.

An ex, ex flame, former lover, or potential love interest (or any combination) in which you are seated across from, bump into, see a photo of and have that Ah-ha moment. 

Your love-bubble or like-bubble bursts and you see the person for who they really are and are met with a variation of feelings and thoughts.  This ‘bubble’ kept you going back for more knowing it wasn’t good for you, enabled you from seeing what your friends were talking about, or perhaps he tells a lie that just cannot be covered up, and – pop – bubble bursts! Or you’re adult enough to burst the bubble and then look at a former lover, flame, or potential and suddenly he doesn’t look so good with those rose colored glasses you were wearing. My friend Samantha said to me while discussing the Ah-Ha moment, “love doesn’t hurt, that’s lust.”  I found that interesting.  Okay then add your lust-bubble is popped too!   

Was he really as hot as I thought he was?  When the mere mention of him made me sweat, those were my lust muscles not my heart muscles?  You thought you were in love with someone who never showed one once of love in return.  Even someone who thinks you are the cat’s meow which then makes you believe he is the dog’s bark and then Ah-ha!  It crashes and burns.  Pop! Pop! Pop! Was that real or did I hallucinate it on the trip I was on?   

I began writing about this awhile back at the start of Mancation because I boldly put myself in this status because I believed I had been mislead and crushed.  Well, I was crushed! As aforementioned, I have definitely made leaps on Mancation – as it is necessary in the healing process – but can’t help but wonder if it was some sort of mirage.  I believed this man broke my heart when in fact he may have broken my spirit, Mancation allowed the heart to continue beating while still maintaining hope.  Even if it were a mirage, it allowed me to set a new standard of what’s acceptable in whatever like, lust, or love bubble stage I am at. 

He – who helped created the sensation of Mancation – told the world that he was “in a relationship.”  Initially I felt like someone punched me in the face, but then because my mirage bubble had been burst by the Ah-ha Moment, I smiled and merely said, “She’s a lucky girl.”  We date and meet one another because we’re trying on what fits and what doesn’t.  In life there are no exchanges.  The only returns can come from things like learning, living and leaping.   Perhaps somewhere in there this is “gift with purchase” as if someone isn’t the right fit; there is someone out there who is.   

Schlep not Worth it - My story

Pertaining to the last entry I posted based on Miss J's link, is love ever worth the schlep even for a dope?  Here’s my story:

I had begun dating Van Gogh after meeting him on an online dating site.  (Mind you, I think it's fair to say I'll never online again)  We seemed to have a lot in common, both creative types and had some great dates. But this was a freelance artist who spent most of his day sleeping while I was working on bringing home the bacon.  I tried to look beyond it since we were still in the "dating with no label" faze but I couldn't help but wonder if I were living some kind of déjà vu from a previous relationship (i.e. the-out -of -work “actor”).  I tried to be open-minded and go with the flow.  

I even felt guilty (though he claimed to always wanting to pay for dates "as the man") and planned a date one night.  From the time he arrived until the last detail, I had it all planned. As we drove in my car he thanked me for the treat as he "spent all his money on me" so it was a nice change. At a stop light, I looked him like you've must be joking?  He wasn't BTW.  And off my look says, "Well, how else was I going to get you?"  Wow.  Um, well it's not like you took me to 4-star restaurants dude, so I'm not sure where I broke the bank when you insisted you were repped by a gallery showing your "art".  I was so mad.  I tried to blow it off and go on our awesome date I planned.  Ice skating was something I loved that I wanted to introduce to him. He pouted cause he wasn't good and just wanted "to watch me".  Annoyed and over it, I told him we would move on to plan B.  I knew of a great band playing at a local bar so we could order drinks and food and perhaps boogie. Well, we did 2 more of the 3 things I love, drink and eat, but I wanted to boogie.  What a bore.  We had been dating like 2 months and I was already bored…

Some conversations of how it killed itself:

…I just don't get him. We had plans 2 weeks ago and he just didn't call...for 4 days and when he did he acted like he didn't do anything wrong. I finally said, "I thought we had plans." His response: "Yeah, I know...but I'm in a funk and I don't have any money." I told him that I understand where he's coming from but he should call and tell me this than just not calling. It's NOT okay. I was pissed and let him know it. I mean we've been "dating" for a couple of months now. I'm bored. He called yesterday and I was just bored with the "I don't have a job" talk and "I did nothing" all day spiel. He asked what I was doing this weekend, and even though it was Tuesday, I already have a jam packed weekend...he says, "Well I'd like to see you if I can get the gas money together." Sexy. I just don't think he's being honest with me enough and I'm over it. Part of me does want to see him so I can end it face to face but if he can't muster up the gas to drive to Hollywood, I may not get my chance.

I thought here was a nice guy for once and he's just as flakey (and admits it) as the others. I always think people are capable of change if they're ready.

I had a message from Van Gogh at like 9:30…wondering what I was doing for the weekend, well I already told you and you're calling me at 9:30 on a Friday night?

Finally, I took the chicken way out and I wrote to him: "I know this may seem late-coming but I feel the need to say hi. For what it's worth, I wanted to tell you that I'm sorry for timing. Timing of this email, timing for a phone call, and just timing in general. I think you're great and I like you a lot but judging by the past couple of weeks we don't seem to be on the same time schedule or something. I value the time we spent together. I wish you nothing but the best today, and always!" SENT at 10pm

(I really wasn’t sorry for any of it.  I didn’t do anything wrong.  But I was trying to take the “nice” way out). 

He responded: the following day by 8pm
"I'm very glad you wrote. I thought the times we've had together were great, but unfortunately yes timing has been a factor. Maybe a little later down the road we can grab some drinks and see what happens? …Any ways, I wish you the best and I'll write as things move along. I hope you'll do the same. Lots of kisses, Van Gogh."

He never wrote.  Now that myspace is out and Facebook is in, we found one another there.  We exchanged a couple of friendly notes to one another but I discovered that he had a woman in his life and told me one night on IM, that they were moving out of state together to “start their life.”  I was really happy for him because as much of a “match” online dating claimed we were, this woman had something I never did. 

Regardless of Mancation past or previous, I’m not jaded. I still truly believe there are good eggs out there.  Not every guy is a liar or a starving artist of some sort.  When you’re looking for something to distract you from what you’ve been dealing with you can convince yourself that something is right, when in fact it’s wrong.  My dad said to me upon my first heartbreak:  Dating shouldn’t be hard but love can be.  Oh, that and “don’t waste your time on someone who won’t waste their time on you.”  10 years later, it still rings true.  Van Gogh is a good guy, just not the guy for me. And he was a cat guy, and I’m a dog person.  It would have never worked. ;)

**Keep in mind also, now thinking about it, this was a guy who wanted to "have the talk" of "Where the relationship was going" after 2 or 3 dates.  He then confided in me that it wasn't fair to  try to convince me to go from date to boyfriend in 3.5 seconds.  It could have been he was so desperate for a plus one that he forgot he wasn't ready.  Sidebar: He had broken off a 3 year engagement about 6 months prior to meeting me.  Hmm. 

Spooky!

"Love is kinda crazy with a spooky little girl like you." 

One of my favorite songs "Spooky" by Classics IV is my inspiration for this next tale.

Halloween! 

What a time it is when we are dressing up as alter-egos or our inner selves and spend the evening "gettin' kind of groovy." It is one day of the year when you can put your mask up instead of letting yours down. Girls dress as slutty as they possibly can because they know they can't get away with their inner slut any other time of the year than to be "slutty Dorothy" or "slutty Snow White". We have come to a time and age when you can pretty much slut-up anything - even an ugly witch is now a slutty witch. And nurses who wear orthopedic shoes or scrubs are still deemed "sexy" (cough, slutty) by wearing the white zip up mini dress bearing major cleave and thigh highs. The only nurse who is ever going to provide medical assistance is behind closed doors, not at your house party, otherwise dial 911.

Back to my point, Halloween becomes so funny to me. I've had friends who can't wait to do the "slutty" thing but that's either for those who need attention or those who seek attention. The men folk are given reason to oogle even though you know you're not going to deliver on your bad-girl decor. Ok, I admit one year I did Miss Behavin' - which was a sex'd up version of a school teacher. I did it but I wasn't into it. Since then the costumes have been a bit more tasteful. Kids, don't give in to peer pressure. There are expectations for Halloween like it's friggin' New Years Eve or something, which I also find tends to be a bit of a disappointment. Go out in whatever capacity you want, just do it safely. And responsibly.

A couple years back, dressed as Devil in a Blue Dress, I met a guy at a party dressed as a vampire. He was mysterious and quiet yet something was going on behind this "costume." He only wanted to chat with me - and not the other 'devils' that were there - and asked to take me out sometime. This did not come without the disclaimer that he is newly single. RED FLAG! RED FLAG! "How long have you been single?" I ask. "3 weeks," he says. I make a face (that's still a very open wound) and say, "Well it sounds like you're attempting to get back out there but I'm a bit leery to the fact that it's still fresh." He was persistent to get my number before the end of the night. He called the very next day and we met to watch football. It was harmless. We went out a couple more times until one day he and I were out and he was telling me how his ex bummed him out...I tuned out on him there and tuned into my girl-dar - abort! abort! Guy-not-over-ex! And so I did, he attempted to reach out a couple more times but I knew the connect wasn't there and he wasn't healed. If you ever read this, hope you're doing well!

I chose to write about Halloween cause it's funny that you can think someone is something they're not simply because they're in "character". Whether you're hiding behind a wig or a mask or a persona for the night, you're either that crazy asshole every day which could make you interesting, or you're only that "character" for a night and then you go back to being whoever you are in existence. This current year I went out with Miss J who dressed as THE first princess of Disney - The Princess and the Frog - and looked cute as a button. I didn't want to put as much effort but was trying to be creative under limited resources, so instead of going as the "devil in disguise," I found a Hawaiian dress in the Art Department of my work, and a sunhat. You know, with some diva sunglasses at home and suddenly, with flip flops, I was on ...yep, Mancation! BRILLIANT!

While we went to our usual haunt, and it was uber low key, we had convinced ourselves that at least we went out and didn't stay in. And also, we did make some waves even on a 'slow' night. As I contemplated in my head whether the crowd would pick up (it did but most people came in a group and left in a group like it was a pre-game before the main event), Super Mario sat down next to me. His friend the Pimp sat down next to Miss J. They wondered if this bar was any good and we filled them in (on normal circumstances) and they asked us to join them elsewhere. And so the Halloween adventure began! In talking to Mario, you have to realize that he is bearing a full on mustache, goatee and wig bearing a hat on-top. I had NO clue who this man was underneath but he was funny, energetic and had the best laugh I had heard in a long time.

We jumped a cab to Hollywood where patrons stopped to take pictures with Mario from the window like he was Elvis or Michael Jackson. Hilarious. We arrive at this hole-in-the-wall we never knew (me and Miss J) existed and it was decent. Made friends with a lady in a wheelchair on the back patio with her 2 daughters. Met the man who plays Capt. Jack Sparrow on Hollywood Blvd. I even posed for a picture with a man who looked like he was on Mancation (like me) but he was "Fear and Loathing..."

Leaving there and stammering through the sea of under-agers on Hollywood Blvd., we sought out "a tiki bar". Giving up on Miss J's 4" heels and conviction that the place didn't really exist, we headed to a different bar. Less crowded. Less clubby. Less bullshit. We could still see the parade of people walk by and enjoy each other's company. I mean, what an unexpected and fun night! Oh, Hallow's Eve! Mario wanted my number at bar one, and I said no. Mancation doesn't allow giving out numbers unless you're worthy.

We walked from Hollywood and something all the way to me and Miss J's hood - it was madness. At this point of hanging for hours, Mario got my number. I didn't ask for his. I stayed on the beach, but now he knows what hotel I'm staying at.

Sidebar - found out that Mario wanted to go to the Tiki bar because we were on (Man) "Vacation" ha ha ha . One of the cutest things I've heard in a while.

Is the Schlep Worth it?

Miss J had sent me a link to an article from Glamour "How Long is the Commute To Your Boyfriend’s Place?..."

Single-ish -a dating blog - by Erin Meanley (the author) blogged about a recent New York Timesstory, When Love is a Schlep. 

It described how different single populations are spread out, and how in her neighborhood, the Upper East Side, has the lowest concentration of singles in Manhattan, as well as "more single women than anywhere else in the city" (64,000)! Great. In this case, ignorance would have been bliss.

The article is also about “long-distance-local couples.” When you and your boyfriend live in NYC, it can take an hour and a half to travel the 14 miles between your apartments, whereas in any other city, it takes 20 minutes. (You think I complain about interborough dating, but even the NYT considers it an issue!) The story talked about how some men feel they would have gone on a second date with a great girl, but decided not to because she lived 2 trains and a bus away.


More on this later because I have had my own run in with this topic - it wasn't love but apparently it was a schlep.   

Chance Encounters

It was a beautiful, sunny day in Los Angeles. I had just gotten to work from the Dentist and was a 30ish year old bearing braces for the first time in her life.  I was in pain and adjusting to these foreign objects in my mouth.  There was a movie being cast in one of the studios so actors were coming and going quickly.  Looking out from the copier I saw this tall drink of water walk in and though a co-worker was talking to me, I blurted out "I think I know him, why?" Of course, I think that a lot because I live in Los Angeles and actors are everywhere.  It wasn't until I watched him walk up the stairs that I realized where I knew him from!

BACKSTORY: About 7 years ago, I was a twenty-something interning at the highest-rated daytime drama.  I often spent time on-set and caught the eye of a certain day player.  Yes, he who just raced up the stairs!  We carried on our flirtation for the two months I spent there that summer and on my very last day, he walked me out, told me to keep in touch should I ever move to Los Angeles permanently, and laid a sweet kiss on my lips.  We did keep in touch but never saw one another, even after I had moved to Los Angeles like a year later.  Oh well, I thought, he's probably married and all that.

There he was in the lobby of my work.  I lingered a bit because even with my non-mental mouth, I was going to re-introduce myself. Maybe it was kismet.  He came down the stairs and I yelled his name.  He looked at me like "Who the hell are you?"  I said, "I just wanted to say hi, we met years ago."  He says, "Yes, I thought looked  familiar, where did we meet?" I said, "I interned at (show title) while you were day-playing. My name's Bradsaw.  I had short blonde hair."  He immediately placed me back in time and said, "Wow, it's been so long. You moved back home after that, do you live out here now?" I said, "Yes, I've actually been living here for going on 8 years now."  I'd like to believe he couldn't believe our paths have crossed when so much time has lapsed.  He asks, "So you work here now?" I said, "Yes, everyday, Monday through Friday." Really? That's the best I could come up with?  "Well," he says with his big smile, and the whole conversation his beautiful brown eyes were glaring at my shiny, plastic teeth as I tried not to speak with an impediment, "good to know. Great seeing you."

And then he was gone.  I didn't even have time to scope for a ring on the hand and I don't think he really cares where I work but at least I had a story!

AFTER POSTING THIS I IMDB'D HIM - 41 AND GOT MARRIED AS RECENT AS 2005.

Proof in the Pudding?

As I continue on whatever stage or status I am on the Mancation agenda, I had some interesting insights and reflections as well as interactions.  That goes without saying.

While out one night (same night as The Bloke run-in), one of my dearest and oldest friends Shadow, says she and the others were having a chat about me.  Really I thought?  She says, "You look great, and just overall carry yourself differently than you have been."  Wow.  Here I thought I was just being "me" on an every day basis but I realized I had laid ground work.  Perhaps, (take notes here) in not having a guy around to frustrate (and age) me, I was taking the time to be who I am, and the woman I know who has been trapped.  Trapped into thinking all guys don't know what they want or send mixed messages.  Ok, relax male population, I know we women mislead too!  But as stated before, I do believe not everyone is an asshole.  Just weed out the assholes and you save yourself heartache, frustration and wrinkles!  I took that all in and was pleasantly surprised. Perhaps in spring cleaning, I was making room...for the "breaker."  He who shall not yet be named.  

Within the same week, I was at my job and in speaking with some of the students, one said to me, "You look great today!"  I thanked her, I mean I do try my best to look professional in that environment.  (Sidebar- this is a student who has been away for a few semesters.) She continues,"No, I've been meaning to tell you that I've noticed you've been looking great a lot lately.  Are you in love? There's something different about you."  I laughed and told her that I wasn't in love but on Mancation.  She giggled and wanted to go on one herself. I said, "Well apparently if you commit, you TOO can look like me" - an informercial at it's best.  ha ha ha ha 

That was twice (if memory serves) that people took notice of me and perhaps verbalized what others have noticed...Could it simply be that in taking a break, ridding the bad, hexing the ex, or holding out for more in good for your complextion and lifestyle?  I enthusiastically say, "HELL YEAH" and pat myself on the back for having a bit of a resolve at this point in the Mancation.    I have never given up hope and the world hasn't either.  


Man Date:  Doing well there, little lady

Mancation - Fact or Fiction?

I have been told stating Mancation poses a challenge.  

Granted. Again, challenges me to weed out those who want to try to "break" Mancation or are just hoping to get mention. Yes, so far I've been able to tell the difference.

While constantly being questioned as to who and why, I get how and what. At length of this Mancation, I have remained true to not dating.  Miles and I had dinner twice and I had a great time, and to be honest he opened a window potentially (though we had no window in the row of the airplane we sat and met). I had two not-dates (maybe one non-date to follow Mancation rules, by second meeting it was an obvious "date") that were special to me and reminded me that I shouldn't be so guarded when a nice guy comes along, even if I'm on Mancation.

As second source said to me, "You claim you're not dating on Mancation but you have been."  Hmm, he's not exactly wrong. Again, I play the hand I'm dealt.  Then I decided I didn't have to explain myself to anyone.  I AM making this up as I go.  I got trampled not only in hope but in belief and I refuse to let it take over but let its flame continue to flicker.  I refuse to believe everyone is an asshole.  And I refuse to waste anymore time on those who make me second guess and can't wait to meet those who prove me right - they do exist.

That all being said, Mancation doesn't mean you stay home and become a hermit.  I have been very adamant about that!  Secondly, to those who are mislead just because I claim I'm not dating, I have said I’m not hating - so my guys friends are most certainly crucial to hang with and bounce ideas off of.

Lastly, despite what believers/non-believers think, I don't walk into a room bearing a sign that says "Hey! I’m on Mancation."  I don't go around and make that my opening line.  It comes up to certain peeps...but again, I don't go around making it world-wide knowledge...perhaps only on this blog. The Blog is safe cause I know I have limited viewers.  Actively being on Mancation and the people you meet and the reactions they bare, have taught me so much.  I had given myself an end date but one never knows the impact someone will make until they make it.

Flexting

We exchange text messages nowadays.  It's suddenly become a modern day dating art form for when you want to be cute when you can't pick up the phone (or perhaps can't pick up the phone to speak but sly to sneak in something witty or sassy).  


I have coined FLEXTING - as in sending flirty text messages.  Flexting keeps the flame burning.  Keeps things safe or perhaps pushes boundaries of how far you could go when not face to face or voice to voice.  


Credit! 


Why not Flext yourself? Okay, you can't flext yourself, you know I mean why not flext someone else...

DISCLAIMER: don't flext and drive (it could be more dangerous than regular texting while driving) 

More Miles...

Remember that sweet guy I met on the plane? We had a great dinner and shared a sidewalk kiss? He flew back home and we kept in contact through flexting, and on occasion a phone call cause he “wanted to hear my voice.”

Upon the last posting of questioning my kissing skills or Mancation for that matter…he came back into town and wanted to see me. The night he arrived I was working and we weren’t able to see one another but had plans to see one another the following evening. We checked in periodically through the day until I hopped in my car and drove to meet him in Hermosa Beach. Upon smelling the ocean and feeling the breeze off the water, I realized this was more of a date than our first dinner encounter in my opinion, as I found myself a wee bit nervous. Would we still have much to say to one another after contacting without any verbalization? Would I still find him funny? Charismatic? The answer was yes from the moment I heard his footsteps in the lobby. We hugged hello and he wrapped his arm around my waist and said, “It’s great to see you.”

We sat and had sushi and wine and he remembered what we ordered our first sushi dinner and I really enjoy talking to him because he asks questions from a perspective of really wanting to know or understand. We stayed at the restaurant until they had to kick us out and walked to the pier to grab another drink. Choice of bar wasn’t the best so we only stayed for one drink before it was proposed to go back to the hotel to sit on the balcony. I know that’s a bit scandalous but I didn’t and wasn’t ready for the night to come to an end. We sat on the patio listening to the ocean and just talking – a sweet moment that I very much appreciated which was met by an almost as sweet kiss. Even though I was invited to stay for the night, I knew I had to go but he hoped to see me again tomorrow before his departure. (Don’t think I didn’t see him size us up in the mirror upon me exiting). I arrived home by 3am and crashed.

However, upon waking the next morning I was exhausted which was only met with the feeling as if I were getting sick. I came home to eat chicken noodle soup in my jammies as Miles met an old friend for beers. The following day I called in sick as I couldn’t even function. As I was mid text to send-off Miles, he was contacting me at the same time! Watching Coraline with my box of tissues, Miles was delayed. He had hoped I was seated next to him on the plane ride back so we could cuddle while looking out the window (he was actually seated this time in a row with a window). I slept the rest of the day upon what a lovely thought that would be...

Man Date - Intrigued but still on the beach 

I'm back!

Sorry I've been gone so long.  Again, working two jobs and trying to keep my head above water, it's been difficult to keep on track.  I still have old stories to post and new stories and theories to share.  Thanks for hanging tight (there is someone out there reading this right?).  I have also decided to redesign the space.  Why not give it a green, earthy feel?